Harry
"Dont worry, I saw Lord of the Rings. Im not going to end this 17 times."

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Harry
"[voice over] I tell him about destiny; hes shaking his head. About dreamgirls; he doesnt care. I mention the underwear thing? He has a fucking conniption. And you? How bout it, filmgoer? Have you solved the case of the - the dead people in L.A.? Times Square audiences, please dont shout at the screen, and stop picking at that, itll just get worse."

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Harry
"This is every shade of wrong."

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Harry
"I swear to God, its like somebody took America by the East Coast, and shook it, and all the normal girls managed to hang on."

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Harry
"[voiceover] I was wetter than Drew Barrymore at a grunge club."

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Harry
"When in doubt, cut up a pig - that was the towns motto."

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Harry
"Your mouth is a recommended place to put a sock."

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Harry
"Doesnt that suck? I just hit you for no reason. I dont know why."

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Harry
"It was the first time I felt how pitying someone and wanting to fuck them can get all tangled up in your head. Overwhelming sadness, meanwhile you got a Rodney. Is that sick? I think… yeah… I think thats sick."

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Harry
"Dont quit your gay job"

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Other
":Bear in TV Ad: I drink Genaro beer. But then, what do I know? Im a bear. I suck the heads off of fish."

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Other
":Mr. Fire: Well, well, look what we got here. How you doin tough guy?[Harry grabs a gun] Oh, you got a gun. Damn, you are tough.[Harry shoots Mr. Fire to death.]"

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Other
":Mr. Frying Pan: No hes the Fire. Fuck you, Mr. Mustard."

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Gay Perry
"This isnt good cop, bad cop. This is fag and New Yorker. Youre in serious trouble."

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Gay Perry
"[About his Derringer] I call it my faggot gun, because its only good for a couple of shots and then you have to drop it for something better."

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