Private Joker
"Is that you John Wayne? Is this me?"

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Private Joker
"[narrating] Paris Island, South Carolina. The Marine Corps Training Depot. An eight-week college for the phony tough and the crazy brave."

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Private Joker
"[narrating] The dead have been covered with lime. The dead know only one thing: it is better to be alive."

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Private Joker
"[narrating] My thoughts drift back to erect nipple wet dreams about Mary Jane Rottencrotch and the Great Homecoming Fuck Fantasy. I am so happy that I am alive, in one piece. In short, Im in a world of shit... yes. But I am alive. And I am not afraid."

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Private Joker
"[being interviewed] I wanted to see exotic Vietnam... the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture... and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill!"

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Private Joker
"Ya know, half of these gook whores are serving officers in the Viet Cong; the other half have got T.B. Be sure you only fuck the ones that cough."

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Private Joker
"[jokingly] A day without blood is like a day without sunshine."

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"Crazy Earl: These are great days were living, bros. We are jolly green giants, walking the Earth with guns. These people we wasted here today are the finest human beings we will ever know. After we rotate back to the world, were gonna miss not having anyone around thats worth shooting."

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"Private Cowboy: You know theres not a single horse in the entire country of Vietnam? Theres definitely something wrong with that."

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"Private Cowboy: I think what shes trying to say is that you black boys pack too much meat."

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"Door Gunner: Anyone who runs is a V.C.! Anyone who stands still... is a well-disciplined V.C.!"

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"Da Nang Hooker: Hey, you got girlfriend Vietnam? Not just this minute! Me so horny. Me love you long time."

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"Private Eightball: What we have here, little yellow sister, is a magnificent specimen of pure Alabama Blacksnake. But it aint too goddamned beaucoup."

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"Private Eightball: [being interviewed] Personally, I think, uh... they dont really want to be involved in this war. You know, I mean... they sort of took away our freedom and gave it to the, to the gookers, you know. But they dont want it. Theyd rather be alive than free, I guess. Poor dumb bastards."

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"Private Eightball: Believe it or not, but under fire, Animal Mother can be a wonderful human being. All he needs is somebody throwing grenades at him til the end of his life."

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