Arthur Herk
"Nina, this is my house, you work for me, and I want to suck your toes."

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Eliot Arnold
"[About Arthur] Arthur Herk. One of the few Floridians who was not confused when he voted for Pat Buchanan."

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Eliot Arnold
"[About Puggy, who has just been paid five dollars for manual lifting and has found a home in a tree] After only twenty-four hours in Miami, Puggy had already found more satisfactory employment and lived in a better neighbourhood than I did."

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Eliot Arnold
"[After his son has just called him a loser] Okay, now its my turn. Up yours, you little shithead. Okay, your turn."

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"Eddie: Lets get the hell outta here, Snake. I think I hear one of them silent alarms."

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"Leonard: If I dont shoot someone soon, Im gonna forget how."

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"Special Agent Pat Greer, FBI: Oh, sure, your name is John, and youre just a hard-working, law-abiding citizen running a shithole bar where you got... no customers."

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"Special Agent Alan Seitz, FBI: [Discussing a top-secret nuclear weapons decommissioning facility in Russia]: They have beautiful churches there. [The others look at him] Travel Channel."

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"Snake: [to the Russians] If you assholes try to call the cops after we leave, the next bullet goes through your head."

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"Puggy: [Opening the movie] My name is Puggy and I live in a tree. I hope I didnt ruin anything for you."

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"Snake: [to Puggy] Next time I see you again, youre dead."

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"Matt Arnold: Uh, Jennys mom opened the door, and I came running up to squirt her. And then, uh, Mrs. Herk jumped me... or jumped ON me. And, uh, and then I went down on Jenny... or I f-fell on Jenny."

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Henry Desalvo
"[Whilst watching the chaotic goings-on at Arthur Herks house] Moron #2 just got Moron #1 all wet."

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Henry Desalvo
"[Whilst watching the chaotic goings-on at Arthur Herks house] There goes the warranty... and there goes the Iron Chef."

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Henry Desalvo
"[Having narrowly escaped arrest from a disinterested police officer] Well, Miami sucks. But the cops are kind of nice."

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